I’m assuming, or at least hoping, that everyone’s head is misshapen.

Dear Feastlings,
Today makes nine weeks of nearly daily paradigm shifts, peppered with a daily dose of fear or joy, uncertainty or gratitude, or some combination of any number of these feelings. And over these nine weeks, I’ve noticed something I already knew: my head is misshapen. Either all of my masks are made incorrectly, which I know is not the case because my friend Patty is no slouch at the sewing machine (on the contrary, she’s kind of a sewing genius,) or far more likely, my right ear sits notably farther back on my head than my left ear. There’s more evidence to back this up: my hats- again, all constructed by professionals- invariably list to the right. I know that facial symmetry is perceived as beauty, so we’ll see what this does to what remains of my self-esteem, but I’m hoping I’m not alone in discovering what a listing hat and mask means. Sigh.
Anyhow, in the spirit of feeling better about myself, I’ve put a special on the menu today of crispy duck salad. That usually gets positive feedback and, asymmetrical head or not, people will likely say they like this dish I made up, and that should do the trick today. It seems arbitrary to me to regard symmetry as beauty anyhow. I’d rather have a tasty meal. So the menu, in case you’re looking for something with which to supplement your impending crispy duck salad, can be found here and the number to call is 326-9363. We’re happy to make something for you to come pick up, or to bring it to your doorstep.

We’ve also got a couple of bottles left of Kent Callaghan and Todd Bostock’s wines if you’r tasting along with their #digitalwineresearch,

and samples being poured tomorrow if you’re participating in our Saturday tasting, “Critical acclaim.

Also by tomorrow, we’ll have figured out what specials we”l be offering on Sunday. Why, you ask, worry about Sunday’s specials already? Because we’ll be doing another delivery run to the north and northwest, and if you live out that way, it may be nice to plan ahead a bit. Here’s where we’ll be stopping on Sunday.

Lastly, but certainly not least, I heard back from my new buddy Tammy at St. Joe’s, and here are the departments we’ll be feeding next Tuesday:

Telemetry – 64

Housekeeping – 63

Med/Surg – 43

ICU – 41

Respiratory Therapy – 38

Observation – 34

Trauma – 7

Labor & Delivery 7

That comes out to 297 meals. Again, here’s how we’ve been doing this: we’re trying to drum up 234 meal donations, and when we reach that magic number, Feast will pick up the tab for the Housekeeping Department. We appreciate all the staff at the various hospitals, of course, but I have a personal fondness for an unsung hero. I can assure you, no one who took a housekeeping job said to him- or herself, “I’d like to risk my health and that of my family in order to run around the hospital cleaning up after everyone.” So I’m calling dibs on Housekeeping. But maybe you or someone you know has a fondness or specific appreciation for the telemetry nurses, or respiratory therapy, or grasp the toll it takes on someone to work in an ICU, and you or someone you know think it would be a kind gesture to treat one of those people to lunch/dinner/whatever meal of the day this ends up being for them. We’ll be taking donations over the phone and we’re as grateful to you as the hospital staff will be, as we’re acutely aware that your generosity, at the same time it’s bolstering the spirits of front line workers, is keeping us all off the dole at the same time. So thank you, everyone, yet again.

Your friend with the misshapen head,
Doug

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