Dear Feastlings,
Evidently, Napoleon once said, “If you wish to be a success in the world, promise everything, deliver nothing.” I regard myself as something of a cynic, but, well, Ouch. I don’t have the temerity to make, or even believe, a statement like that. And while it might suit people of a Napoleonic bent, I can’t regard that particular combination as being at all demonstrative of success.
I have two sales reps, neither of whom reads the nonsense I write each week, so I think I’ll do no harm here when I say that the one that I regard as a success- the one who has more of my trust and my business- is the one who manages my expectations. The one who fails me on the regular is the promiser.
Every month, as our menu changes, I jump through hoop after hoop trying to get a guarantee of this ingredient or that one; and nearly every month I’m disappointed, and forced to explain to staff of guests that it was sworn up and down that we’d get what we ordered, but it’s out of my hands. Nowadays I try to dodge the inevitable pain that comes with a cocksure promise, but it often puts me between a rock and a hard place.
I’ve been waiting for weeks on news as to whether the snapper I’m hoping to get for Valentine’s Day will be available, but weather is fickle, which means fishing is fickle, which means I’ve been avoiding making a promise I can keep. Meanwhile, the promiser has offered me all the exotic produce I need, but I don’t believe him any more than I’d believe Napoleon, or any of the Napoleonic characters rapidly congesting our societal landscape.
The result is that we’re less than two weeks from Valentine’s Day, and I’m only just now publishing the menu, and that I’m not even in a position to guarantee the menu, even this close to the date. I’m posting the menu cautiously; if I had my druthers, I’d still hold off posting it, but by now, poor Mary Ann has intercepted so many calls about the Valentine’s Day menu, I can’t hold off any longer. So here’s the TENTATIVE Valentine’s Day menu. It’s probably correct- I’ve chosen the ingredients that are most likely to be available- but if next week turns out to be anything like this week, there’s be broken promises again, and, like the sorrel and marjoram and fresh peas that were promised to us three days running, only to be snatched from our grasp, I may be pivoting for the umpteenth time and making a change or five to the menu the night before.
Likewise, I’ve been awaiting certainty in order to post the menu for our wine dinner with the people of new-to-Arizona Paso Robles winery Copia on February 25th. Here goes:
And we’ve of course got a wine tasting scheduled for this Saturday with our pal Emilie:
Two days ago marked the beginning of the February menu, but I’ve been holding off on the email for a couple of days now, and I can’t stand it any longer, so here’s a link to that as well. If you don’t like salsify, I feel sad for you.
https://www.eatatfeast.com/dining/menus/lunch-dinner/
As to the Napoleons in my everyday life, be they promisers, imperialists or outright liars, I’m inclined to opt for exile to Corsica, not for them but for myself. I’ll be the one sipping on a glass of Nielluciu, and perhaps eating a Napoleon. The crispy, airy, crumbly kind. Happy February, my friends.
Your pal,
Doug